Charlie Sheen: I was the highest paid T.V actor in the world. I was making millions every week for my leading role in Two And a Half Men. Then I had the equivalent of 10 mid-life crises at once; A complete and utter meltdown that eventually got me fired from the highest paying job on TV. Hey, I’ve still got money for cocaine and hookers so F all you losers. You don’t have what I have; Tiger blood baby.
Katherine Heigl: I was the most promising tall, blond and beautiful actress in Hollywood circa 2008. I had a leading role in a wildly popular TV series (Grey’s Anatomy) and had just starred in the most successful comedy in years (Knocked Up). But then I took on Judd Apatow and developed a “She’s hard to work with” reputation! I’m not hard to work with, it’s just that I’m prettier and better than everyone so I should be treated as such. Isn't that fair?
Mel Gibson: That’s cute. Now settle down while I tell you what a real ‘mistake’ looks like.
Mel Gibson was on top of the world; he had it all. Multiple Oscars for Braveheart, Cult hero status due to Mad Max, and Box Office gold courtesy of the Lethal Weapon series. And later, both critical and commercial success for Passion of The Christ.
But on the fateful night of July 28th, 2006, his gold-plated house of cards came crashing down. Arrested for driving under the influence, Gibson launched into an Anti-Semitic tirade that brought his career to a screeching halt.[1]
You mother f****r. I'm going to f*** you. "F*****g Jews... The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world. Are you a Jew?
To a female officer:
What do you think you're looking at, sugar tits?
This is but a small sample. Max really went Mad.
Needless to say, this did not go down well with the Hollywood community. Gibson’s alcoholism had already rubbed people the wrong way and this incident pushed him over the edge. He was effectively blacklisted from Hollywood for a decade. He has since made a ‘comeback’ of sorts with the critical success of Hacksaw Ridge. His friends in the industry (Notably Robert Downey Jr.) have been appealing on his behalf to let the bygones be bygones.
And with Hacksaw Ridge getting nominated for Best Picture and the sequel to Passion of The Christ in the works, it looks like the Hollywood elite has heard Iron Man’s appeals.
Katherine Heigl: Yup, you win.
Charlie Sheen: Yeah Yeah, whatever, do you have Sugar Tits’ number?
Mel Gibson: You need help Sheen.
Charlie Sheen: I don’t need help, I have Tiger blood.
Katherine Heigl: Hey Mel, wanna hear a joke? How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take?
Mel Gibson: Don’t know.
Katherine Heigl: Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.
Charlie Sheen: FML.
Footnotes
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