The one place that you travelled to that changed your life

NEGI RK Monday, November 16, 2020

The one place that you travelled to that changed your life

A2A

When my sister moved to India I was embarrassingly naive and at the same time arrogant about my place in the world. I assumed being a “westerner” I was more educated on music, geography, and literature . How wrong I was.

I had the audacity to try to explain (westernsplain?) to an Indian friend how to pronounce the word Himalayas… when the Himalayas are in India. (btw this person has a nuclear physics degree). I had a moment when she told me gently, no. It’s Hi – MAAH - laya

This one interaction made me realise that I have a lot to learn. From everyone I meet and connect with, anywhere on the planet. I travel with my children to give them experiences that question their preconceived thoughts.

Some more of the practical ways I changed after living in India

I tried quite a few new things.

After about 6 months of wearing western business wear to work I decided to try wearing Kurta’s instead. They are much more comfortable when it’s hot and (I feel) flattering. I love the colours and patterns available. I now wear kurta’s in Australian in summer for the above reasons. I also like to feel like i’m carrying a bit of India around with me. :)

I like to wash my bum! Or at least use wet wipes (since there are no health faucets in Australian toilets).

It really makes sense when you think about it. It’s a lot cleaner. My daughter also loves it when we go to Asia and there’s a health faucet. For obvious reasons I don’t have a picture of that!!

I learnt to drive in India. It’s a lot different to driving in Australia, you end up honking more often and kind of weaving your way around in the traffic wherever you can fit the car.

This is me driving my Maruti 800 in Bangalore during a Monsoon flood.

I say Chumah and Ayo.

I’m not sure how I picked them up, but they’ve become part of my vocabulary and now my kids say Ayo too!

I do the “head nod” when I speak to an Indian. If I go into an indian grocery store or restaurant I am guaranteed to start wobbling my my head while speaking to the people who work here.

I eat with my hand if I’m eating south indian food, especially Biryani. I just enjoy my food more if I eat it with my hand, I think it’s more of a sensory experience. After a few weeks of noticing people around me eating with their hand I thought I’d give it a try. I felt pretty awkward at first and it was quite difficult to do. But I persisted, and now there are certain dishes that I only eat with my hand. Biryani especially, it just tastes better with all the spices, meat, a little raita mixed together with my hand. Eventually I learned how to do it so my whole hand didn’t get messed up! :)

I learned (even more) to go with the flow.

I’m already a fairly relaxed person; if someone calls and says they’re thinking of coming over to visit I will definitely say yes and plan anything else around it or adjust my plans. But living in India is a whole new level of flexibility. Things rarely go exactly as you plan them, but there’s no point getting frustrated about it, just trust that it will happen and before it does enjoy the ride! This helps in Australia as well, I try to put things in perspective and if things don’t happen exactly as I expect I can usually adjust something to make it work! It’s also good to be a little flexible when you have kids, if they are feeling a little silly and want to have a dance in the shopping centre, or roll around on your bed when you were planning to get up and get their breakfast, it’s more important to take a few moments to have fun, have the opportunity to connect with the kids and relax. Deadlines should not rule your life, your loved ones should. Swalpa Adjust Madi has become a part of my life!